Coconut Milk Whipped "Cream"

Whipped cream is such a wonderful treat....on coffee, hot chocolate, pies, etc.  This whole non dairy eating really hurts one's whipped cream tooth! I have tried making a tofu version  and it was tasty but not as fluffy as I had hoped.

So, this will be my latest attempt. Coconut milk, chilled, spiced, and whipped....mmmmm....that just sounds rich and delicious.

(photo courtesy of Nutty Kitchen)

Helpless

Maybe it was today's wind....why not? These Chinook winds bring headaches and all sorts of maladies to people. Which on a blustery day like today, well, it's no wonder. Crazy winds! Close downtown Calgary due to the winds & danger, kind of winds....but no, it's not due to the wind...

.....it's the ADHD monster.

Grocery shopping on a sunday can test the patience of ANYONE just based on volume. Today was weird. I was calm. The rest of the world was not. Signs and garbage and grocery carts and such were blowing everywhere ( I do not exaggerate!). Debit machines were down. People were huffy. I was calm.

Shocking, I know!

My W was not. He was FAST. His engine was running on overdrive. Dialled up. Happy. Just High. Singing Christmas songs.....walking fast....on the cart, off the cart, on the cart, off the cart...but staying with me.

The second grocery store which we desperately needed as it's the only one in our community that carries spelt or kamut bread....was a strange experience. There was hardly anyone there....and the debit/credit machines were not working so there was a 7 person line up for the in-store bank machine.

The ATM machine is in an entrance with automatic doors and a large pop and microwave popcorn display. Welllllll......while we waited one boy sat on the window sill wearing his Santa hat and eating his bun.

The other boy circled the pop display....sneaking behind and around....trying to trick me....smiling away....eventually I asked him to show me how he can be the best listener and sit down (because he had went out the doors & wasn't listening....by this time we're getting a look or two from other patrons....& I frankly don't care). So down he sits beside his little brother....glancing and smirking at me....until he couldn't handle it anymore.....

.....and he snuck behind the pop display with a light giggle. I had just finished saying "Come on out"...when he KNOCKED OVER the popcorn display.

Oh mannnn!

People were not pleased. Goodness adults can be passive-aggressive crusties! I ignored them, calmly walked over to W, and advised him to pick it all up. Which he did. Without complaint. Bup and I helped with the last few boxes and off we went to purchase our bread.

And that's when he said it. Holding my hand, bouncing around....

"I feel helpless."

Ugh. Right into the heart. A spike.

I can hardly see due to the shining lightbulb that just went off in my head.

As I crouch down, hold him by the hand, and ask W to look me in the eye, I respond,

"You are. "

"What?! You're say I'm helpless??!!"

"Where's your engine?"

"Fast!"

"Yes, it's FAST W. I know this. I know you can't help it. I know you aren't making it this way. That's why I agree that you are helpless. I am NOT mad at you. I know you don't want to be fast. I know it's hard for you right now. BUT I have to help you. I have to correct you, protect you and help you with that fast engine. Okay? Look in my eyes. Okay?"

Oh! That realization (again) that W can feel he's out of control, but cannot stop it and does not like it......well, what can I say?

It's headshaking.....wrong....sad.....frustrating....heartbreaking.....and screams VOLUMES to me.

My little man.

So, if you see a child bouncing to no end out there....and a mom just going along, trying to adjust as she can.....stop before you judge. Maybe that child is feeling "helpless" like my 6 yr old did today.

Emotional Overreaction Sans Professionalism

Ohhhh, it was just one of those days. Two days really.

It all started with Wednesday which was Bup's Neuro appt with Dr. B....just our regular Neurologist. Whom I adore. He's heartsy and kind and gets R and is open and smart and all those great doc characteristics that we pray for.

Buuuut why did the bells in my head ring when Nurse Neuro almost apologetically advised that Dr.B has a Resident with him.

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!

For whom the bell tolls.

Our appointment started at 130 and it was 345 when it finished. Both Bup and I were so tired. Thank goodness I had a squishy ball with "worms" inside for us to play catch with.

And Mr. Resident's assessment skills were ridiculous. Really. Asking R if he knew where he was. What building are you in? Give me a break! This is a child who only shrugs his shoulders at people he knows if they get too close and ask too much.....let alone a fuzzy faced, hootspa pronouncing pretend Dr.

Finally sweet Dr. B was beckoned and we could get down to business.

No seizure was captured during the EEG.

He is spiking on the borders of removal areas.

Meds were upped as much as they could be which is only a ml of Trileptal. The meds are BARELY holding the seizures at bay. If I am 30 min late with his morning meds....and it happens sometimes.....he has a seizure by 10am. Clock work.

Dr. B doesn't want to bring him in for a VEEG yet because he has been through so much lately soooooooo.....we wait until June for a MRI and VEEG with no meds.

That was Wednesday.

Lurking in my email was a glimpse of the PT assessment results. Scored in the 1st percentile. Severe Gross Motor delay.

Ugh.

So, that was just ONE-MORE-THING.

Then Thursday arrived & for some reason, I lost it when talking to the director of his preschool about the PT assessment. Just started blubbering and it totally took me off guard. Poor lady. I scared the pants off her because I have never shown that kind of emotion in front of the school team. I ended that phone call in a hurry...but not before politely refusing to come see her that morning.

Well, wouldn't you know that Ms. Director (whom I adore) set up a meeting for me with the PT, Speech Path, President of IFK, and a Psychologist. Now what does that tell you?

They were alarmed! Me...blubbering on the phone....look what kind of action/fall out that brought! Lord...(my eyes are rolling into my head as I write this!)

The psychologist? She's for me. Not Bup. Every Friday morning we are now meeting.

If I wasn't so embarrassed I would laugh hysterically.

My interblogging, seizure sharing friend recently wrote a post in regards to "a good cry". Well, Happy's Mommy, apparently I needed one, didn't recognize that and it snuck up on me. Cause when I met with the team Fri morning....I bawled through that too.

At least they laughed when I declined the offer of coffee and requested vodka instead. Ahhhh....they already think I'm nuts hence the Psychologist so I might as well bring booze and humor into the picture.

If my next post is from the Mental Health Unit at PLC, then please note that the booze injection was not seen as funny! ;)

Read to Me

Totally warmed my heart to hear W's enthused response when R asked him to read to him. They sat together through four books.

Warms my heart that W can read to his brother willingly and happily!

Loving these brief moments of brotherly bliss.

Bring on the Ranch!

I love Kraft dressings. Filled with chemicals, sugar and other words that I cannot pronounce. We have not had these hear tattack enducing, taste bud freezing, cellulite building bottle of salad toppings in our fridgidaire for years.

And now, we don't even miss the Ranch Dressing because we have a homemade version that is even tastier!

Oh yeah.....and.....I'm willing to share the recipe. Aren't you so lucky!

Ranch Dressing Mix

1/2 cup onion powder

1 Tbsp celery salt of Vege-Sal (used VS)

2 Tbsp parsley flakes

1 Tbsp poppy seeds

1 Tbsp dill weed

2 tsp garlic powder

2 tsp sweet basil

1 1/2 tsp salt

1 Tbsp dry sweetener

Mix together and store in an airtight container. Makes 1 cup.

Ranch Style Dressing

1 cup mayo of your choice

1 Tbsp lemon juice (optional)

1/2 cup water

1 rounded Tbsp Ranch Dressing Mix

Mix & serve with tossed salad or as a dip for crudites.

YUM!!! Healthy yum! No fillers, no mystery names, chemicals, etc.

Where did I find such a recipe? Why the 7 Secrets Cookbook of course. It's one of my all time favorites when it comes to vegan, healthy from scratch foods.

Battle Ax Parenting

Did your parents ever spew the words, "She's just an old battle ax!" It's definitely NOT a compliment. Tonight, it's a statement that I'm sure my boys, especially W, would spew at me, if he knew it. Thank heavens for small blessings because he doesn't!

What is your after school/bed time routine for your kiddos?

Seriously. I need major help here as something has gone terribly askew. Oh, I know what it is but now how to change it.

You see, my boys want me to lay with them in their beds, read a couple of books to them and then sing three songs, then continue to "snuggle" until they fall asleep. As heartwarming and sweet as that is....I just can't do it any longer!

What is your "tuck in" method?

My house looks like a bomb went off....cause NOTHING gets accomplished in the evenings. Either I fall asleep with the boys or when I finally get away from them, I am so exhausted that I again accomplish nothing.

Plus, I get no down time for myself. Maybe this comes off as selfish and maybe it is, but as a married somewhat single parent, it's imperative that I recharge. Daytime does not allow for much alone time even with W in school full time and R part time. Grocery shopping, gymnastics, doctors appointments, OT Group Therapy,....it all still takes place, which equates more mom, organizer, admin assistant, health care generalist role than M role. Know what I mean?

SOOOO.....much to my children's dismay I've instilled the new routine which is reading together on the couch for 15 min or so and then taking each boy to their own room with a kiss and I love you and that's it.

W doesn't understand why I am being so mean. In fact, I tucked him in a hour ago and he was just up for the third time asking if I could snuggle him.

It's killing me! And I am at a complete loss as to what is right or not.

So there ya have it, I've moved into the "Battle Ax Parenting" zone and out of the glimpse of Attachment Parenting zone (written as I wear a wee 6 week old babe in a sling;).

Chair Love...and Fear

I have a vision for our living room. It's tiny and full and has no flow. The leather couch and love seat are wonderful but take up too much space, are dark, and really only seats 4 people because very rarely does more than two people sit on the the 3 seater couch.

Four cozy chairs and a round coffee table would be comfortable, encouraging of settling in for a long chat and lots of laughs. Place in front of the fire place. Ahhh....wanna come over and curl your feet up in a big chair, enjoy a cuppa or a glassa, while the kiddos run wild, bring their latest lego creations to show & share???

The layout of both pics are what I have in mind. Not necessarily the style, however I do enjoy the wainscotting in the first example.

Hiding in our garage, waiting patiently for me are wing chairs that need to be recovered. My grand plan is to do so and redesign our living room like so.

BUT.....

I'm scared.

I have the fear.

Fear of the project. Can I do it? Really do it.....complete those chairs so that they look lovely and not an embarassment?

These chairs are in my vision. Did you know they were recovered with a painters drop cloth? How's that for inexpensive and innovative?! Could I dye the canvas a darker beige? Then Scotch Guard them to my heart's content. After all I do have two boys! And a dog.

Over thinking? Yes. That's why I'm scared. Usually I just jump in, figure it out as I go.....uh, like the time I used an electric knife to cut a whole in the drywall....and it all works out. But this time, I just keep thinking and looking at pictures and magazines and have not got started!

My wingback chairs have a fun story already as my friend, Thelma, and I picked them up late one evening from two different homes as they were a Kijiji bargain, chatted with one lovely couple and watched their neighbor vacuum his driveway.....I kid you not! So....they deserve refinishing just for conversation factor.

Or maybe each chair in a different pattern but matching colors? Like the following chairs?

(pic sources: Pinterest, Miss Mustard Seed, BHG)

Hopefully....the fear will dissipate and we'll have "new" chairs to curl up in.